Welcome to Kizunaya sharehouse. This article is for all the new families who have moved into Kizunaya sharehouse.
It’s been almost a month since you all moved in. Have you gotten used to the Kizunaya sharehouse? If there’s anything you need help with, you can contact us directly from the official LINE during the first month! Please feel free to ask any questions you may have.
This is the third and final issue of the FAMILY LETTER for our NEW FAMILY members. Thank you very much to everyone who read the first and second issues. To those who skipped the first and second issues, please be sure to check out the first and second issues as well.
In Part 3, we’ll take a look at some of the things you might wonder about when you think of a share house.
“Is there any trouble in a share house?
Living in a shared house is living with other people. Naturally, living under the same roof with people from completely different backgrounds, ages, and values, there could be trouble.
In the past, there have been many articles on how to avoid problems in share houses, such as “No common space! In order to avoid problems in a share house, there was talk of a “share house without a living room,” but it’s easy to get into trouble when you can’t see each other. The idea behind Kizunaya share houses is to avoid problems.
It’s easy to feel uncomfortable when you don’t know what’s going on. That’s why Kizunaya sharehouse values relationships where people can see each other, and in addition, we don’t think it’s wrong for problems to occur. What’s important is how you think and deal with problems and issues when they arise. We asked families who have been living in a share house for more than 3 years about their thoughts on problems, which are important when living together.
So please take a look. Let’s go!
Yukarin is always in a warm mood and is like a big sister to everyone. Please tell us what Yukarin thinks is important when living in a share house and what she does when problems occur.
When you live in a shared house, everyone has different living patterns and standards of cleanliness, so there are sometimes problems that might occur. Whenever I have a problem, the first thing I do is to think about the situation that caused the problem and what I can do to make everyone’s lives more comfortable.
In the process, sometimes I have to warn your housemates. It takes a lot of courage to do this. When I tell them, I try to be careful to “give them only the facts” and “use I・ message”. There are also times when I am the one being warned. When that happens, I apologize honestly! This is very important. I also express my gratitude to them for having the courage to tell me. I believe that “thank you” and “I’m sorry” are important words in order to interact with people comfortably.
(What is an I・message?)
For example, someone thinks “You should do it this for me,” “Why don’t you do this for me,” or “You need to do this for me.” This is You・message” that is a way of communication in which the subject is “the other person.
On the other hand, communication in which the subject is “I”, such as “I felt this way” or “I feel very happy when you do this”, is called ” I・message”.
That’s very nice. It is true that when problems occur, it is often we think “I want you to do more like this!”. If we say “I’d be very happy if you could do this for me. ” ,this is very different even though it seems to be the same, I felt it again listening to Yukari’s voice.
Do you have any ideas that are important to Yukarin before the troubles occur? .
First of all, I value the daily communication with everyone in the house family. I think that when trouble occurs, it’s almost always due to a lack of communication with them.
I would like to build a relationship where I can be brave enough to tell them when something is troubling me, and they can tell me. To do this, I would like to start by greeting people and getting to know them.
And I always try to think of ways to make the house family feel comfortable. Different from living alone, I try to keep in mind that we are all living together. After using a common area, I check to see if it is clean before leaving. That way, the next person can use it comfortably.
And lastly, we all know that we can be careless. We accidentally forget, we accidentally leave without cleaning. I’m sure there must be many of them, but if you see a lot of careless situations continuously, it may make you feel sad. The house I live in has 40 people, so if one person is careless once a month, that means there is a carelessness somewhere in the house every day. Everyone is careless. When that happens, we follow up with each other.
(I’ll tell them if I see the same carelessness three times in a row.)
I was reminded once again that cleanliness and shared living are a collaboration with everyone who lives there. Finally, please give some messages to the new families moving in! .
In a new share house, I’m sure there are some things that will worry you until you get used to it. Kizunaya share house is a share house that values community. That’s why if there’s something that’s troubling you, please share it with everyone around you in an I•message. Instead of thinking alone, new ideas can be born when you think together. You can also expand your own world by sharing with others what is troubling you. Of course, it would be great if you could share your happy and sad moments as well. Let’s enjoy our share house life together!
I feel really proud that Yukarin is loved by everyone because of this way of thinking. Yukarin, thank you for sharing your wonderful way of thinking with us! .
We’re looking for the real voices of house families so that new family can move in with a feeling of safety.
What was it like when you first moved in? How did you get used to it? What do you think is the most important thing? We would like to hear from you and create an opportunity to connect House families with new House families. The NEW FAMILY LETTER is a three-part series.Don’t miss it!
＜NEW FAMILY LETTER vol.1＞ Tips for House Communication
＜NEW FAMILY LETTER vol.2＞ Tips on house cleanliness and manners
＜NEW FAMILY LETTER vol.3＞ Tips on how to think when problems occur in the house